Why is Long John Silver's called "Long John Silvers"? Long. John. Silvers. I mean, really*?
Is it because John was known for being very long ... in patience, let's say? Could it have been a rallying cry used by pirates during the Age of Exploration? Like, "Long live the king!" or "Long John Silvers!" Has someone ever messed it up and said, "Long John's Silver!" instead? Or is it an anagram for something like, "JS—I'll veg no horns," a cryptic in-phrase used by vegetarians from the hood when they want to eat seafood, (for as we all know, the "JS," similar in usage to PS, stands for "jive secret," or for the uninitiated "just saying").
What do you think?
(* Note: I'm aware of the name's connection to a certain work by Robert Louis Stevenson. No need to point that out, thank you. This is an absurdist thought experiment—play along!)