Ewan's First Christmas (Abridged)

'Twas the week around Christmas, and all through the house
Not a creature was drooling, least not on a blouse;

The bright boy was nestled all snug in his bed;

While visions of stocking-stuff danced in his head;

And Mommy in her earrings,

And I, too, madcap,

Had just settled our buns for a spell to unwrap,

When out from the kitchen arranged on a platter,
We sprang from our seats for good eats—pitter-patter.

When what to my grumbling stomach did sound,
But a miniature laugh from this face jolly round,

With little left of our meals, once juicy and thick,
To the waiting presents we returned right quick.

More rapid our heartbeats with presents became,

And we pointed,

and shouted,

and called them by name:

Now Splasher!

Now Dancer!

Now Lancer!

And Vixen!

On carpet, a Cutie!

On Donnie!

And nice men!

A bit fussy and plump, a right jolly wee elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

He spoke not a word, sitting straight on his tail,
And filled his wee diaper; then let out a wail.
To the top of our knees! To the edge of the wall!
(Now, where to begin!?) Merry Christmas to all!