Below are the reprinted lyrics to "Weird Al"'s parody. Simply ask yourself how much the bolded parts apply to you. If you are now or have ever been guilty of what's stated in bold, you award yourself a point (+1). You may award yourself less than a point (0, +0.1, +0.25, +0.5, or +0.75) depending on how much you estimate the stated applies to you. [I've provided bracketed comments, like this one, after each to better guide how one might consider applying what's stated.] My results are below.
[The lyrics:]
They see me mowin'
My front lawn
[I have been seen mowing my lawn before, so that's +1]
I know they're all thinking
I'm so white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Can't you see I'm white n' nerdy
Look at me I'm white n' nerdy!
I wanna roll with
The gangsters
But so far they all think
I'm too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
I'm just too white n' nerdy
Really, really white n' nerdy
First in my class here at M.I.T.
[Didn't go there and I was not first in my class in college, but I was ranked 4th in high school, +0.25]
Got skills, I'm a champion at D&D
[That's a big fat +1 for me]
MC Escher that's my favorite MC
[My favorite MC is probably Hammer, so no]
Keep your 40
I'll just have an Earl Grey tea
[I'd prefer tea to alcohol probably 5 times out of 10, so that's +0.5]
My rims never spin to the contrary
[True, +1]
You'll find they're quite stationary
All of my action figures are cherry
[No, but I do have six 6-inch ones that sit on my desk, +0.5]
Steven Hawking's in my library
[Nope]
My MySpace page is all totally pimped out
[No on MySpace, Facebook, or Twitter, so that's probably like a –1 for me]
I got people begging for my top 8 spaces
Yo, I know pi to a thousand places
[Let's see … 3.141
Ain't got no grills but I still wear braces
[Did Invisalign as an adult, so… +0.5]
I order all of my sandwiches with mayonnaise
[Not all of them, but I do prefer it nowadays, +0.5]
I'm a whiz at minesweeper I can play for days
[Never much cared for it, but I know what it is and have at least played it before, +0.1]
Once you see my sweet moves you're gonna stay amazed
My fingers movin' so fast I'll set the place ablaze
[A reference to typing speed and accuracy? I'm prob like 65 wpm at 99% accuracy, and the average is 40 wpm, and competitive is 120 wpm, so… +0.54]
There's no killer app I haven't run
[There're certainly various apps out there I know nothing about, but I'm more "cutting edge" than my parents and most coworkers, +0.5]
At Pascal, well, I'm number 1
[Had to look this one up, so that's a zero]
Do vector calculus just for fun
[Hell no!]
I ain't got a gat but I got a soldering gun
[Huh-uh]
"Happy Days" is my favorite theme song
[Not even close]
I can sure kick your butt in a game of ping pong
[Hypothetical; I have enjoyed playing before though, +0.25]
I'll ace any trivia quiz you bring on
[Again hypothetical; but I'd be game and am a practiced hand at running trivia sessions, +0.75]
I'm fluent in JavaScript as well as Klingon
[Thankfully, no]
(Here's the part I sing on)
They see me roll on, my Segway
[Never ridden a Segway in public]
I know in my heart they think I'm white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Can't you see I'm white n' nerdy
Look at me I'm white n' nerdy
I'd like to roll with
The gangsters
Although it's apparent I'm too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
I'm just too white n' nerdy
How'd I get so white n' nerdy?
I've been browsing, inspectin'
X-men comics you know I collect 'em
[X-Men, no; Batman, yes! +0.75]
The pens in my pocket
I must protect 'em
[No pocket protector here]
My ergonomic keyboard never leaves me bored
[Never had one, but I do use a comfy mouse pad, +0.25]
Shopping online for deals on some writable media
[Never online, but I have shopped for CD-Rs and DVD-Rs before, +0.5]
I edit Wikipedia
[No, but I'll probably do other Wikis, +0.25]
I memorized "Holy Grail" really well
I can recite it right now and have you ROTFLOL
[A few lines maybe, sure, +0.25]
I got a business doing websites
[Not this guy]
When my friends need some code who do they call?
I do HTML for them all
[Not in years, and it was only ever for me, +0.1]
Even made a homepage for my dog!
[…yes, yes I did, +1]
Yo, got myself a fanny pack
[Yup +1]
They were havin' a sale down at the GAP
Spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap
POP POP! Hope no one sees me gettin' freaky!
[I do like popping them, but not THAT much, +0.25]
I'm nerdy in the extreme and whiter than sour cream
[Mostly white, but not that pale, +0.25]
I was in AV club and Glee club and even the chess team!
[No, but I was in TV/Drama and Academic Decathlon: we did play chess, +0.5]
Only question I ever thought was hard
Was do I like Kirk or do I like Picard?
[More of a Star Wars guy]
Spend every weekend at the renaissance fair
[No, but I did go once two years in row, +0.5]
Got my name on my underwear!
[Pssh, no]
They see me strollin'
They laughin'
And rollin' their eyes 'cause I'm so white n' nerdy
Just because I'm white n' nerdy
Just because I'm white n' nerdy
All because I'm white n' nerdy
Holy cow I'm white n' nerdy
I wanna bowl with
[Do I enjoy bowling? Half the time, +0.5]
The gangsters
But, oh well, it's obvious I'm white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
I'm just too white n' nerdy
Look at me I'm white n' nerdy!
[And I'll give myself another +1 for creating this exam :p]
There are 40 bolded statements. So, by adding it all up, my total of 13.3903/40 = 0.334 or 33% (updated 11/26/24). That makes me a quarter Mexican, a quarter Scots-Irish, parts German and Cherokee, and fully a third white and nerdy—good to know! How about you?
There's no killer app I haven't run
[There're certainly various apps out there I know nothing about, but I'm more "cutting edge" than my parents and most coworkers, +0.5]
At Pascal, well, I'm number 1
[Had to look this one up, so that's a zero]
Do vector calculus just for fun
[Hell no!]
I ain't got a gat but I got a soldering gun
[Huh-uh]
"Happy Days" is my favorite theme song
[Not even close]
I can sure kick your butt in a game of ping pong
[Hypothetical; I have enjoyed playing before though, +0.25]
I'll ace any trivia quiz you bring on
[Again hypothetical; but I'd be game and am a practiced hand at running trivia sessions, +0.75]
I'm fluent in JavaScript as well as Klingon
[Thankfully, no]
(Here's the part I sing on)
They see me roll on, my Segway
[Never ridden a Segway in public]
I know in my heart they think I'm white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Can't you see I'm white n' nerdy
Look at me I'm white n' nerdy
I'd like to roll with
The gangsters
Although it's apparent I'm too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
I'm just too white n' nerdy
How'd I get so white n' nerdy?
I've been browsing, inspectin'
X-men comics you know I collect 'em
[X-Men, no; Batman, yes! +0.75]
The pens in my pocket
I must protect 'em
[No pocket protector here]
My ergonomic keyboard never leaves me bored
[Never had one, but I do use a comfy mouse pad, +0.25]
Shopping online for deals on some writable media
[Never online, but I have shopped for CD-Rs and DVD-Rs before, +0.5]
I edit Wikipedia
[No, but I'll probably do other Wikis, +0.25]
I memorized "Holy Grail" really well
I can recite it right now and have you ROTFLOL
[A few lines maybe, sure, +0.25]
I got a business doing websites
[Not this guy]
When my friends need some code who do they call?
I do HTML for them all
[Not in years, and it was only ever for me, +0.1]
Even made a homepage for my dog!
[…yes, yes I did, +1]
Yo, got myself a fanny pack
[Yup +1]
They were havin' a sale down at the GAP
Spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap
POP POP! Hope no one sees me gettin' freaky!
[I do like popping them, but not THAT much, +0.25]
I'm nerdy in the extreme and whiter than sour cream
[Mostly white, but not that pale, +0.25]
I was in AV club and Glee club and even the chess team!
[No, but I was in TV/Drama and Academic Decathlon: we did play chess, +0.5]
Only question I ever thought was hard
Was do I like Kirk or do I like Picard?
[More of a Star Wars guy]
Spend every weekend at the renaissance fair
[No, but I did go once two years in row, +0.5]
Got my name on my underwear!
[Pssh, no]
They see me strollin'
They laughin'
And rollin' their eyes 'cause I'm so white n' nerdy
Just because I'm white n' nerdy
Just because I'm white n' nerdy
All because I'm white n' nerdy
Holy cow I'm white n' nerdy
I wanna bowl with
[Do I enjoy bowling? Half the time, +0.5]
The gangsters
But, oh well, it's obvious I'm white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
I'm just too white n' nerdy
Look at me I'm white n' nerdy!
[And I'll give myself another +1 for creating this exam :p]
There are 40 bolded statements. So, by adding it all up, my total of 13.3903/40 = 0.334 or 33% (updated 11/26/24). That makes me a quarter Mexican, a quarter Scots-Irish, parts German and Cherokee, and fully a third white and nerdy—good to know! How about you?
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