Mister Zsasz

And now for one of the truly depraved:

VICTOR ZSASZ
Male Human Maniac* Strong 6/Fast 2/Dedicated 1; CR 10
Medium-size Humanoid (height 5’ 9”, weight 155 lb.); Age mid 30s
* See Menace Manual

Init +6; Senses (core) Listen +0, Search +3, Spot +3; Senses (house) Listen/Spot +10, Search +3
Languages English

Defense 20, touch 20, flat-footed 18; Defense (house) 20, touch 16, flat-footed 18; (+2 Dex, +8 class)
hp 90 (9 HD); Mas 20; DR 5/—
Fort +9 (+14 vs. massive damage), Ref +6, Will +3
Action Points 17

Speed 35 ft.
Melee unarmed +11/+6 (1d6+5 lethal/nonlethal, 20) or
Melee slam +11 (1d6+5, 20) or
Melee knife +11/+6 (1d4+5, 19-20) or
Melee by weapon +10/+5 or
Ranged by weapon +9/+4
Space 5 ft. by 5 ft.; Reach 5 ft.
Base Atk +7; Grp +15
Atk Options Precise Strike, Streetfighting
Special Qualities ability surge 1/day, freak traits, immune to mind-affecting effects, maniac traits

Abilities Str 16 (12), Dex 14 (13), Con 17 (13), Int 16 (15), Wis 10, Cha 12
'(-)' indicate original ability scores.
Allegiances cutting, chaos, evil, blood; Rep +3; San –10

          Note: Zsasz suffers from a particularly virile strain of indefinite amok psychotic disorder and exhibitionism.
Feats Brawl, Combat Martial Arts, Improved Damage Threshold, Improved Grapple (see Urban Arcana), Improved Initiative, Precise Strike (see Urban Arcana), Simple Weapons Proficiency, Stealthy, Streetfighting, Toughness, Weapon Focus (knife)
Skills (core) Bluff +8 (+1 after 1 min. study), Climb +10, Gamble +4, Hide +9, Intimidate +8 (+1 after 1 min. study), Jump +7, Knowledge (business) +5, Knowledge (streetwise) +5, Knowledge (tactics) +6, Move Silently +9, Profession (businessman) +2, Read/Write English, Sense Motive +7 (+8 after 1 min. study), Sleight of Hand +8, Speak English, Spot +3
Skills (house) Athletics +15, Gamble +4, Knowledge (business) +6, Knowledge (streetwise) +7, Knowledge (tactics) +8, Perceive +10 (+1 on Sense Motive after 1 min. study), Persuade +13 (+1 on Bluff, Intimidate after 1 min. study), Profession (businessman) +2, Read/Write English, Sneak +14 (+2 on Hide, Move Silently), Speak English
Talents (Strong) Improved Melee Smash, Melee Smash
Talents (Fast) Increased Speed
Talents (Dedicated) Empathy
Starting Occupation (core) Entrepreneur (Bluff, Gamble as permanent class skills)
Starting Occupation (house) Entrepreneur (Gamble, Persuade as permanent class skills)
Possessions casual outfit (prison attire; 2 lb.), knife (1 lb.), various personal items
Wealth Bonus +1

The Roman

A major player featured in Year One, The Long Halloween, and Batman Begins:

CARMINE “THE ROMAN” FALCONE
Male Human Charismatic 4/Gangster* 6; CR 10
Medium-size Humanoid (height 5’ 11”, weight 185 lb.); Age late 50s
* See Past

Init –1; Senses Listen +2, Search +2, Spot +2
Languages English, Italian, Portuguese (speak only), Spanish (speak only)

Defense (core) 13, touch 13, flat-footed 13; Defense (house) 13, touch 10, flat-footed 13; (–1 Dex, +4 class)
hp 50 (10 HD); Mas 13
Fort +6, Ref +6, Will +7
Action Points 6

Speed 30 ft.
Melee unarmed strike +8/+3 (1d6+1 nonlethal, 20)
Melee by weapon +7/+2
Ranged Berreta pistol +5/+0 (2d6 ballistic, 20, 40 ft., S, 15 box)
Ranged by weapon +5/+0
Space 5 ft. by 5 ft.; Reach 5 ft.
Base Atk +6; Grp +8
Atk Options Point Blank Shot, Sneak Attack +2d6
Special Qualities street traits

Abilities Str 12 (13), Dex 9 (10), Con 13 (14), Int 15 (14), Wis 15 (14), Cha 18 (15)
'(-)' indicate original ability scores.
          Note: Carmine has age penalties and bonuses due to middle age.
Allegiances the Falcone family, Gotham City, money, law, evil; Rep +8; San 65
Feats Brawl, Confident, Iron Will, Minions (Leader score: 22; see Past), Personal Firearms Proficiency, Point Blank Shot, Renown, Simple Weapons Proficiency, Trustworthy, Windfall
Skills (core) Bluff +12 (+6 toward women), Diplomacy +18 (+6 toward women), Disguise +9 (+6 toward women), Drive +4, Forgery +10, Gamble +12, Gather Information +15 (+6 toward women), Hide +4, Intimidate +13 (+6 toward women), Knowledge (art) +6, Knowledge (business) +5, Knowledge (current events) +9, Knowledge (streetwise) +10, Move Silently +4, Perform (keyboards) +7 (+6 toward women), Profession (businessman) +7, Read/Write English, Read/Write Italian, Sense Motive +14, Speak English, Speak Italian, Speak Portuguese, Speak Spanish
Skills (house) Disguise +9 (+6 toward women), Drive +4, Forgery +15, Gamble +12, Gather Information +16 (+6 toward women), Knowledge (art) +6, Knowledge (business) +7, Knowledge (current events) +11, Knowledge (streetwise) +10, Perform (keyboards) +7 (+6 toward women), Perceive +14, Persuade +17 (+6 on Bluff toward women, +2 on Diplomacy, Intimidate [+8 toward women, both]), Profession (businessman) +11, Read/Write English, Read/Write Italian, Sneak +9, Speak English, Speak Italian, Speak Portuguese, Speak Spanish
Talents (Charismatic) Charm (females), Favor
Talents (Gangster) Infamy, Opportunist, Sneak Attack (+2d6), Underworld Contacts (3 total)
Starting Occupation Criminal & Entrepreneur (Forgery as permanent class skill, +1 on Knowledge [current events]; Brawl)
Possessions (carried weight 6 lb.) formal outfit (tuxedo; 3 lb.), gold-studded ring (fitted with poisonous barb that, after priming the ring with a twist, automatically injects fer-de-lance venom [Fort DC 14, initial effect 1d6 Con, secondary effect 1d6 hp] into a victim with whom he shakes hands), Beretta 92FS (3 lb.)
          Note: As a prominent leader of one of the major criminal syndicates in Gotham, the Roman has access to many restricted and illegal resources, and almost never lacks for access to any common items.
Wealth Bonus +22

More on the way!

The Master of Fear

Another d20 look at a villain populating the Nolan films.

The SCARECROW, PROFESSOR JONATHAN CRANE, PhD
Male Human Fast 2/Smart 4/Field Scientist 5/Pharmer* 3; CR 14
Medium-size Humanoid (height 6’, weight 140 lb.); Age late 40s
*See Future Pharma

Init +1; Senses (core) Listen +2, Search +10, Spot +6; Senses (house) Listen/Spot +13, Search +14
Languages Akkadian (read/write only), Algonkin (read/write only), English, German, Hungarian (read/write only), Latin

Defense 24, touch 24, flat-footed 19; Defensive Martial Arts, Dodge (+2 Dex, +3 Int, +9 class)
hp 61 (14 HD); Mas 11
Fort +7 (+4 vs. addiction), Ref +8, Will +9 (+4 vs. addiction)
Action Points 18

Speed 30 ft.
Melee unarmed strike +5/+0 (1d4–1 lethal/nonlethal, 20) or
Melee by weapon +5/+0
Ranged atomizer +9/+4 (see below) or
Ranged by weapon +8
Space 5 ft. by 5 ft.; Reach 5 ft.
Base Atk +6; Grp +5
Atk Options none
Special Qualities freak traits, immune to fear effects**

** Dr. Crane’s extensive experiments with chemical fear inducers and pharmaceutical fear blockers have inured him to any further effects of most forms of natural fear. This was achieved only through embracing an irrational case of chiroptophobia (fear of bats) brought on by his own methods and obsession with the Batman, resulting in his current state of insanity.

Abilities Str 9 (10), Dex 14, Con 11 (12), Int 17 (16), Wis 14 (12), Cha 14 (12)

'(-)' indicate original ability scores.
          Note: Professor Crane has age penalties and bonuses due to middle age.
Allegiances fear, the human mind, evil; Rep +4 (+2 toward those with at least 1 rank in Knowledge [behavioral sciences]); San 15
          Note: Dr. Crane suffers from indefinite anitsocial, avoidant, and compulsive personality disorders.
Feats Cautious, Chemical Youth (see Future Pharma), Chemically Attuned (hallucinogens; see Future Pharma), Combat Martial Arts, Defensive Martial Arts, Dodge, Educated (Knowledge [behavioral sciences, earth and life sciences]), Exotic Weapon Proficiency (atomizer), Far Shot, Simple Weapons Proficiency, Weapon Focus (atomizer)
Skills (core) Bluff +6, Computer Use +10, Concentration +4, Craft (chemical) +12, Craft (pharmaceutical) +22, Decipher Script +7, Demolitions +9, Disable Device +9, Disguise +6, Hide +6, Intimidate +7, Knowledge (arcane lore) +10, Knowledge (behavioral sciences) +15, Knowledge (earth and life sciences) +12, Knowledge (streetwise) +10, Knowledge (technology) +9, Knowledge (theology and philosophy) +10, Move Silently +7, Profession (teacher) +6, Read/Write Akkadian, Read/Write Algonkin, Read/Write English, Read/Write German, Read/Write Hungarian, Read/Write Latin, Research +14, Search +10, Sense Motive +9, Sleight of Hand +7, Speak English, Speak German, Speak Latin, Spot +6
Skills (house) Computer Use +10, Control +7, Craft (chemical) +12, Craft (pharmaceutical) +22, Deduce +14, Demolitions +9, Disable Device +9, Disguise +6, Knowledge (arcane lore) +10, Knowledge (behavioral sciences) +15, Knowledge (earth and life sciences) +12, Knowledge (streetwise) +10, Knowledge (technology) +9, Knowledge (theology and philosophy) +10, Persuade +11, Perceive +13, Profession (teacher) +6, Read/Write Akkadian, Read/Write Algonkin, Read/Write English, Read/Write German, Read/Write Hungarian, Read/Write Latin, Research +14, Sneak +13, Speak English, Speak German, Speak Latin
Talents (Fast) Evasion
Talents (Smart) Exploit Weakness, Savant (Craft [pharmaceutical])
Talents (Field Scientist) Minor Breakthrough (behavioral sciences), Scientific Improvisation, Skill Mastery (Computer Use, Craft [chemical], Craft [pharmaceutical], Demolitions, Disable Device, Knowledge [behavioral sciences]), Smart Defense
Talents (Pharmer) Better Living Through Chemistry (+1), Increased Absorption Rate, One Man’s Poison
Starting Occupation Academic (+1 on Knowledge [behavioral sciences], Knowledge [earth and life sciences], Research)
Possessions scarecrow-themed outfit (2.5 lb.), skull-shaped atomizer (2-shot cartridge expels “fear gas”; has two attack modes: [A] a spray that requires a ranged touch attack affecting all creatures on a line [provokes AoO, 10 ft. increment., max range 50 ft., though this attack mode reduces the toxic potency by –2 on the save DC], or [B] a cloud as an area attack [does not provoke AoO, fills one adjacent 5-ft square]), 3d4 doses of fear toxin (see below), 2d4 doses of fear-inhibitor (see below)
Wealth Bonus +13

NEW Poison Fear Toxin
Delivery Method: inhaled (or injury); Effect: initial effect panicked, secondary effect panicked (if already panicked, the target instead suffers 1d3 Wisdom damage and must make a Will save DC 20 or experience a relapse of the toxin’s effects again 1 minute later; subjects whose Wisdom score is reduced to 0 by the effects of this toxin die immediately of fright); Save DC: Fort 20; Craft DC: 31 (or 26); Purchase DC: 15 (or 12); Time: 16 hours (or 8 hours) [1d4 doses]

This fear-inducing toxin consists of synthetic adreno-cortical secretions and strong hallucinogens which prompt neuromuscular spasms, cardiac arrhythmia, panic attacks, and potentially death.
          Note: Fear toxin is a specially concocted poison that Crane has mastered through pharmaceutical means, as opposed to most poisons (i.e. made by use of Craft [chemical]). Crane may make this poison using Craft (pharmaceutical) instead, but he must also succeed on a DC 20 Craft (chemical) check after each period of creation, otherwise his fear toxin takes on an effective shelf life of 1 week.

NEW Drug Fear-Inhibitor “Fear No More”
Potency: 5 (6); Effect(s): Hallucinogenic (6); Saving Throw: Will negates (harmless; see description); Drawback(s): Acute Side-Effects, Reduced Shelf Life; Duration: Varies (see description); Side-Effect(s): Ability Damage (1d6 Wis, Fort halves), Memory Loss (Will negates); Method of Use: Inhaled (8-round onset); Shelf Life: 3 months (D); Craft DC: 30; Purchase DC: 24 (Illegal); Time: 4 hours (1d4 doses)

A precursor and base drug used to derive his fear toxin, Crane’s “Fear No More” formula negates the user’s normal cautionary reaction to danger and instills a nearly suicidal level of uninhibited fearlessness. Users are immune to all mind-affecting fear effects (including use of Intimidate), are immune to the cowering, panicked, and shaken conditions, and receive a +6 bonus against all other mind-affecting effects. Users are also compelled to do things they might otherwise not (e.g. seek out dangerous thrills, take risks against enemies, gamble on their own lives); for each hour not engaged in such daring activity, the user suffers a cumulative –1 on all other checks (maximum –12) until the drug wears off.

The drug lasts only 6 hours if the user is impaired or kept immobile, but can last up to until the user’s Wisdom ability damage has completely healed or until the user drops unconscious from damage. Users may attempt a DC 21 Will save to ignore all the drug's primary (harmless) effects, though a separate save must still be made to ignore the drug's side-effects.

Stay tuned!

The Demon's Head

A second round of d20 write-ups for the villains from Nolan's Bat-flicks gives us:

RÂ’S AL GHÛL               

(pronounced "raysh ahl gool")
Male Human Legendary Strong 5/Fast 3/Smart 3/Dedicated 6/Charismatic 3/Mastermind* 5; LA +2; CR 27
Medium-size Humanoid (height 6’ 5”, weight 215 lb.); Age unknown (apparent mid 40s, believed to be over 600)
* See Urban Arcana

Init +8; Senses (core) Listen +11, Search +10, Spot +15; Senses (house) Listen/Spot +31, Search +25
Languages English, Arabic, Cantonese, Farsi (speak only), German (speak only), Hebrew, Hindi (speak only), Japanese, Latin, Mandarin, Middle Egyptian (read/write only), Portuguese (speak only), Russian (speak only), Sanskrit (read/write only), Spanish (speak only), Tibetan (speak only), Urdu (speak only)

Defense 28, touch 28, flat-footed 28; Defensive Martial Arts, Dodge (+4 Dex, +14 class)
hp 168 (25 HD); Mas 16
Fort +14, Ref +13, Will +20
Action Points 16

Speed 30 ft.
Melee unarmed strike +19/+14/+9 (1d4+6 lethal/nonlethal, 19-20) or
Melee unarmed strike +17/+12/+7 (1d4+6) and
Melee unarmed strike +17 (1d4+4, two-weapon) or
Melee katana +21/+16/+11 (2d6+6, 19-20) or
Melee scimitar +21/+16/+11 (1d6+6, 18-20) or
Melee katana +17/+12/+7 (2d6+6) and
Melee scimitar +17 (1d6+4, two-weapon)
Ranged by weapon +19/+14/+9
Space 5 ft. by 5 ft.; Reach 5 ft.
Base Atk +15; Grp +21
Atk Options Agile Riposte, Combat Expertise, Improved Disarm, Improved Sunder, Opportunist, Point Blank Shot, Power Attack, Spring Attack, Two-Weapon Fighting
Special Qualities legend traits (14)

Abilities Str 19 (17), Dex 18 (17), Con 16, Int 20 (17), Wis 23 (17), Cha 21 (18)
'(-)' indicate original ability scores.
          Note: Râ's al Ghûl has age bonuses but no penalties due to venerable age (see below).
Allegiances global harmony, ecological balance, law, his family, evil, the League of Assassins; Rep +9; San 34
          Note: Upon emerging from a Lazarus Pit, Râ's al Ghûl possesses abnormal physical prowess (temporary +4 alchemical bonuses to Str, Dex, and Con), but also suffers from a fit of madness (making him immune to mind-influencing effects and temporarily reducing his Int and Wis to 1/4 the above listed values) that lasts for a brief period. Afterward, Râ's' abilities return to normal (though he must succeed on a Sanity check or risk losing 1 [on a success] or 1d10 sanity points). Much is unknown about the complete beneficial characteristics of Lazarus Pits, but frequent usage (even over long periods of time) may result in serious side-effects. Lazarus Pits can also help to prolong life. Râ's is believed to be many centuries old, and so long as he continues to use the Lazarus Pits periodically he shall stave off the physical aging process. However, Râ's' decrepitude is hastened earlier and earlier with each visit to the Lazarus Pit, and his physical abilities will degrade by 3 points for each equal length of time that passes after the period in which he is restored.
Feats Agile Riposte**, Aircraft Operation (helicopters)**, Arcane Skills (see Urban Arcana), Archaic Weapons Proficiency, Armor Proficiency (light), Combat Expertise, Combat Martial Arts, Combat Throw**, Confident**, Deceptive, Defensive Martial Arts, Dodge, Educated (Knowledge [earth and life sciences, history]), Exotic Melee Weapon Proficiency (katana), Focused**, Improved Combat Martial Arts**, Improved Disarm, Improved Initiative, Improved Sunder**, Iron Will**, Low Profile**, Mobility, Personal Firearms Proficiency, Point Blank Shot**, Power Attack, Precise Shot**, Simple Weapons Proficiency, Spring Attack**, Surface Vehicle Operation (sailboat), Trustworthy, Two-Weapon Fighting**, Weapon Focus (katana)**, Weapon Focus (scimitar), Windfall
** Bonus feats acquired from the Legend template.
Skills (core) Balance +10, Bluff +23 (+3 toward men, +6 after 1 min. of study), Climb +12, Computer Use +8, Concentration +15, Craft (chemical) +10, Craft (pharmaceutical) +10, Decipher Script +17, Demolitions +10, Diplomacy +26 (+3 toward men, +6 after 1 min. of study), Disguise +10 (+3 toward men), Drive +7, Forgery +13, Gamble +14, Gather Information +26 (+3 toward men), Handle Animal +11 (+6 after 1 min. of study), Hide +10, Intimidate +19 (+3 toward men, +6 after 1 min. of study), Investigate +10, Jump +10, Knowledge (arcane lore) +18, Knowledge (current events) +15, Knowledge (earth and life sciences) +18, Knowledge (history) +19, Knowledge (physical sciences) +10, Knowledge (streetwise) +12, Knowledge (tactics) +9, Knowledge (technology) +10, Knowledge (theology and philosophy) +15, Listen +11, Move Silently +10, Navigate +10, Perform (dance) +7 (+3 toward men, +6 after 1 min. of study), Perform (stringed instruments) +8 (+3 toward men, +6 after 1 min. of study), Pilot +8, Read/Write Arabic, Read/Write Cantonese, Read/Write English, Read/Write Hebrew, Read/Write Japanese, Read/Write Latin, Read/Write Mandarin, Read/Write Middle Egyptian, Read/Write Sanskrit, Research +15, Ride +11, Search +10, Sense Motive +24 (+6 after 1 min. of study), Speak Arabic, Speak Cantonese, Speak English, Speak Farsi, Speak German, Speak Hebrew, Speak Hindi, Speak Japanese, Speak Latin, Speak Mandarin, Speak Portuguese, Speak Russian, Speak Spanish, Speak Tibetan, Speak Urdu, Spellcraft +9, Spot +15, Survival +16, Swim +13, Treat Injury +15, Tumble +11, Use Magic Device +10
Skills (house) Athletics +24, Computer Use +10, Control +17 (+2 on Balance, Concentration), Craft (chemical) +11, Craft (pharmaceutical) +11, Deduce +25, Demolitions +10, Disguise +12 (+3 toward men), Drive +7, Forgery +13, Gamble +14, Gather Information +28 (+3 toward men), Handle Animal +11 (+6 after 1 min. of study), Knowledge (arcane lore) +19, Knowledge (current events) +16, Knowledge (earth and life sciences) +18, Knowledge (history) +20, Knowledge (physical sciences) +10, Knowledge (streetwise) +12, Knowledge (tactics) +10, Knowledge (technology) +10, Knowledge (theology and philosophy) +15, Navigate +10, Perceive +31 (+6 on Sense Motive after 1 min. of study), Perform (dance) +7 (+3 toward men, +6 after 1 min. of study), Perform (stringed instruments) +8 (+3 toward men, +6 after 1 min. of study), Persuade +20 (+11 on Bluff, Diplomacy, Intimidate [+16 toward men, +17 after 1 min. of study]), Pilot +8, Read/Write Arabic, Read/Write Cantonese, Read/Write English, Read/Write Hebrew, Read/Write Japanese, Read/Write Latin, Read/Write Mandarin, Read/Write Middle Egyptian, Read/Write Sanskrit, Research +16, Ride +11, Sneak +16, Speak Arabic, Speak Cantonese, Speak English, Speak Farsi, Speak German, Speak Hebrew, Speak Hindi, Speak Japanese, Speak Latin, Speak Mandarin, Speak Portuguese, Speak Russian, Speak Spanish, Speak Tibetan, Speak Urdu, Spellcraft +10, Survival +16, Treat Injury +15, Tumble +11, Use Magic Device +11
Talents (Strong) Extreme Effort, Improved Melee Smash, Melee Smash
Talents (Fast) Evasion, Opportunist
Talents (Smart) Plan, Savant (Knowledge [earth and life sciences])
Talents (Dedicated) Empathy, Intuition, Skill Emphasis (Treat Injury)
Talents (Charismatic) Charm (males), Favor
Talents (Mastermind) Equipment Connections, Exceptional Minions, Imposing Reputation, Minions, Plan X, Uncanny Dodge 1
Starting Occupation (core) Adventurer (Bluff, Intimidate as permanent class skills; Archaic Weapons Proficiency)
Starting Occupation (house) Adventurer (Persuade, Ride as permanent class skills; Archaic Weapons Proficiency)
Possessions (total weight 14 lb.) formal outfit and cape (4 lb.), katana (mastercraft [+1]; 6 lb.), scimitar (mastercraft [+1]; 4 lb.)
          Note: As the leader of a powerful organization and centuries old collector and dealer of rare and expensive items, Râ's al Ghûl already has access to most any item he needs at any given time, including restricted, illegal, or military items.
Wealth Bonus varies (can get as high as +40 depending on his activities)

More to come!

The Man Who Laughs

Leading up to the debut of The Dark Knight Rises next month, I've decided to post updated versions of my d20 write-ups on the key villains from the Nolan films, this one from The Dark Knight. (These versions of the characters are not intended to represent the film versions, however, but more a timeless modern interpretation from the comics.) Who better to start with than…!

The JOKER
Male Human Legendary Lucid Maniac Fast 3/Smart 3/Charismatic 1/Glamourist* 6/Swindler** 5; LA +1; CR 19
Medium Humanoid (height 6', weight 160 lb.); Age unknown
* See Urban Arcana
** See Future

Init +2; Senses (core) Listen +9, Search +13, Spot +11; Senses (house) Listen/Spot +24, Search +13
Languages English, Farsi (speak only), Spanish (speak only)

Defense (core) 22, touch 22, flat-footed 20; Defense (house) 22, touch 14, flat-footed 20; Dodge (+2 Dex, +10 class)
hp 98 (18 HD); Mas 14; DR 5/–
Fort +10 (+[see below]† vs. poisons, diseases, radiation sickness; +5 vs. massive damage), Ref +14, Will +13
Action Points 19

Speed 30 ft.
Melee unarmed strike +11/+6 (1d6+1 nonlethal, 20) or
Melee by weapon +10/+5 or
Ranged razor-edged throwing cards +12/+7 (2, 20, 10 ft.) or
Ranged by weapon +11/+6
Space 5 ft. by 5 ft.; Reach 5 ft.
Base Atk +9; Grp +11
Atk Options Drive-By Attack, Improved Feint, Opportunist, Streetfighting
Special Qualities ability surge (1/day), freak traits, immune to mind-affecting effects, internal toxicity (unique trait)†, legend traits (4), lucid maniac traits (see below)

† Due to crazed ingenuity and a polluted biology, the Joker has perfected a heightened level of resistance to poisons, diseases, and other bodily contagion by gradually subjecting himself to greater and greater doses of said intoxicants. Built up over years of experimentation and exposure, this internal toxicity grants him the ability to substitute his ranks in the Craft (chemical) skill for his Fortitude bonus when resisting such intoxicants. As a reaction, the Joker may spend an action point to do so. However, he may never raise his Constitution beyond its current score as a result.

Abilities Str 13 (9), Dex 14, Con 14 (10), Int 18 (16), Wis 14, Cha 19 (17)
‘(-)’ indicate original ability scores.
Allegiances chaos, jokes, evil, laughter, Batman; Rep +9; San –10
          Note: Joker suffers from permanent obsessive megalomania and acute narcissism.
Feats Action Boost, Aircraft Operation (helicopters), Alertness, Brawl, Builder, Charismatic Plus (see Future), Confident, Deceptive, Dodge, Drive-By Attack, Exotic Weapon Proficiency (throwing cards), Frightful Presence∫, Improved Feint∫, Iron Will∫, Meticulous, Personal Firearms Proficiency, Sidekick (Leader score: 25+; see Past), Simple Weapons Proficiency, Streetfighting∫, Toughness
∫ Bonus feats acquired from the Legend template.
Skills (core) Bluff +23 (+6 vs. Sense Motive, +7 when lying), Computer Use +9, Craft (chemical) +24, Craft (mechanical) +9, Craft (visual art) +9, Demolitions +15, Diplomacy +7 (+7 when lying), Disguise +14, Drive +6, Escape Artist +12, Forgery +12, Gamble +10 (+7 when cheating), Gather Information +10, Hide +9, Intimidate +15, Knowledge (art) +9, Knowledge (current events) +11, Knowledge (popular culture) +14, Knowledge (streetwise) +11, Knowledge (technology) +11, Listen +9, Move Silently +8, Perform (stand-up) +10, Pilot +6, Read/Write English, Research +8, Search +13, Sense Motive +10 (+6 vs. Bluff), Sleight of Hand +14, Speak English, Speak Farsi, Speak Spanish, Spot +11
Skills (house) Computer Use +9, Craft (chemical) +27, Craft (mechanical) +10, Craft (visual art) +9, Deduce +11 (+2 on Search), Demolitions +15, Disguise +16, Drive +7, Escape Artist +12, Forgery +12, Gamble +10 (+7 when cheating), Gather Information +10, Knowledge (art) +9, Knowledge (current events) +11, Knowledge (popular culture) +15, Knowledge (streetwise) +12, Knowledge (technology) +11, Perceive +22 (+2 on Listen/Spot, +6 on Sense Motive vs. Bluff), Perform (stand-up) +10, Persuade +26 (+2 on Bluff, +2 on Intimidate, or +6 on Bluff vs. Sense Motive, or +7 on Bluff/Diplomacy when lying), Pilot +6, Read/Write English, Read/Write Farsi, Read/Write Spanish, Research +8, Sneak +23, Speak English, Speak Farsi, Speak Spanish
Talents (Fast) Evasion, Opportunist
Talents (Smart) Savant (Knowledge [popular culture]), Trick (DC 17)
Talents (Charismatic) Dazzle (DC 21), Fast-Talk, Taunt (DC 21)
Talents (Glamourist) Audience, Hidden Allegiance, Hidden Motives, Self-Confidence
Talents (Swindler) Cheat Fate, Fortune's Favor +2, Thousand Faces, Warp Probability (30 ft.)
Starting Occupation (core) Creative (+1 on Bluff, Disguise, Perform [stand-up])
Starting Occupation (house) Creative (+1 on Disguise, Perform [stand-up], Persuade)
Possessions formal outfit (stylized purple zoot suit; 3 lb.), 8 razor-edged throwing cards (mastercraft [+1]), acid-filled balloon (requires only a ranged area attack to hit; delivers [potent] 2d6 acid damage to everything within 5 feet of the target zone, dealing 1d6 acid damage each round for two more rounds thereafter; targets that suffer a direct hit must also make a Fort save DC 15 or suffer 1 point of Con damage due to the fumes), joy buzzer (requires only a melee touch attack to hit; carries a charge that inflicts 4d6 points of electricity damage, rechargeable at any electrical outlet in 10 minutes; can be used to deliver a surprise attack in the palm of the hand with a successful Sleight of Hand check [damage is automatic if target agrees to a handshake, though a Bluff check may also be required]), 2d4 doses of “Smilex” (see below)
Wealth Bonus +15

NEW Archetype Lucid Maniac (Maniac [see Menace Manual] variant)
CR: Same as base +1.
Hit Dice: No change.
Attacks: No change.
Special Qualities: Refer below.
          Ability Surge: Once per day as a free action, the lucid maniac can temporarily increase any two of either its Strength, Dexterity, Intelligence, or Charisma scores, but doing so imposes a penalty on its saving throws. While this ability is in effect, the lucid maniac gains a +4 morale bonus to both scores but takes a –2 penalty on all saving throws. Ability surge lasts for a number of rounds equal to the lucid maniac’s character level. Following an ability surge, the lucid maniac is worn out (–2 to any two of the ability scores listed above) for as many rounds as the surge was in effect, but it may negate this penalty as a free action by spending an action point.
          Damage Reduction 5/– (Ex): A lucid maniac ignores the first 5 points of damage dealt by any attack.
          Immunities (Ex): A lucid maniac is immune to mind-affecting effects. However, it may choose to temporarily drop this immunity as a free action for as long as desired.
          Incredible Mien (Ex): Each lucid maniac possesses traits unique to their own psychological makeup and mania. These may manifest as conditional bonuses to saving throws, or skills, or may afford the character added or amended ways of utilizing feats or talents available to them. These benefits are always related to the character’s background and associated mental state, but otherwise provide the character with nothing more than what it can already do (i.e. a lucid maniac tough would no be able to amend the Second Wind or Stamina talents in order to have them behave as the regeneration ability would). Below are some examples of how this applies:
          -“Heroic Class” Plus feats: Upon selecting one of these feats, the lucid maniac may ignore the restriction limiting it to one talent from a single talent tree.
          Resistance to Massive Damage (Ex): A lucid maniac gains a +5 species bonus on Fortitude saves to negate the effects of massive damage.
Allegiances: Previous allegiances are not lost but any that conflict with the following are replaced by them: chaos and evil. Changed allegiances might cause the loss of particular class abilities (see Allegiances on page 37 in the d20 Modern Roleplaying Game).
Saves: Same as the base creature, with a +2 bonus on Fortitude saves, and modified by new ability scores.
Ability Scores: A lucid maniac gains the following ability score increases: Str +4, Con +4.
Feats: A lucid maniac may choose any two of the following as bonus feats: Alertness, Animal Affinity, Blind-Fight, Deceptive, Endurance, Improved Damage Threshold, Stealthy, Toughness, or Vehicle Expert.

NEW Poison Joker Venom ("Smilex")
Delivery Method: contact (or inhaled); Effect: initial 3d6 rounds laughing paralysis, secondary 3d6 Con damage; Save DC: Fort 18; Craft DC: 39 (or 34); Purchase DC: 18 (or 15); Time: 24 hours (1d4 doses)

This horribly virulent and debilitating poison attacks the victim’s entire nervous system, bleaching the skin in places, and often leaves the deceased victim’s face frozen in a rictus death grin.

FREAK TRAITS (House Rule)
Freaks are formed by a combination of tragedy and depravity. “Freak” is a special quality acquired by certain characters who have suffered from temporary or indefinite insanity (i.e. through Sanity loss). Freaks receive 1 bonus action point for every 3 Sanity points lost.

A dark lord, a couple of jokers, and a little Garth

On Sunday, June 3rd, Yume and I went to the open quad area where the annual "America Day" festivities are held in Misawa. In the 3 years I've been here, this was my first experience at America Day, though I'm glad I was able to attend. It's mostly what you might expect. Droves of people show up to gorge themselves on junk food and spend money on kitschy crap that they could otherwise do without—but it's all in good fun!

Yume and I first toured the entire grounds, consisting of around fifty or so covered booths and stands full of people all hawking their wares. Naturally, the hawkers were foreigners, almost exclusively Americans stationed at the base nearby, though the event is designed to draw the local Japanese, young and old alike. From what I could tell (hundreds if not a few thousand showed up), it was a success. There was a stage set up for live performances, and even a basketball court where a Japan vs. USA game was scheduled (which I missed). Touring the booths, we picked up some Gatorade, some delicious brownies, and a Monster energy drink (that Yume seemed to love) before standing in line for nearly 40 minutes waiting on a single freakin' turkey leg. It was worth it, however, allowing us time to chow down on a shredded barbecue pork sloppy joe, grab a bag of Funyuns (sooo natsukashii!), a can of Dr. Pepper, and snap a few pictures.

First, we came across Garth (and the female Wayne?) wearing a kick-ass retro Batman shirt.

Throw me the rock, let's roll! I was totally like, "No way!" when I saw this cat strolling the crowd. All hail, Lord Vader!

I think Yume is still more impressed at how great her Monster tastes. Sheesh!

This is what happens when you try to give the Dark Lord a hug.

GRRRRRRRRRWWWWWLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

A phonetic translation of Chewbacca into Japanese ("chu" and "baka") and then back into natural English again would be something like, "middle idiot" or "stupid note." I'm also adding those to my list of cool band names, such as: "Monkey's Uncle" and "Crashing Through Skylights."

Even the presence of these two clowns doesn't make this picture any less cute.

Who's the middle idiot now?

Anyway, I think it's safe to say I'm grooming Yume into just as fine a geek as I am! (Hey, things could be worse.)