Friday, May 8, 1981
You are now 7 weeks old, and how you've grown!! Except for an occasional gassy stomach you are thriving very well. I also feel very well. I'm looking and feeling pretty much the way I felt before I became pregnant. Through it all I think I have fared well. Despite the down days, I now am spiritually, physically, and mentally on a much more even keel. A few days after coming home with you from the hospital some of the girls from church prepared and brought over a complete dinner meal—boy, I can say it sure was nice, my mom and your father and I really enjoyed it. Since that time, I have been given a shower and the next door neighbors have been very helpful to me especially since your nanny left. Your Aunt Sue had another little boy and his name is Scott Joseph—so you have another little cousin. I sure hope you grow to love and care for your family, cousins, etc., cuz they're important.
My dear little one, grow up strong and be kind to people and most of all give thanks to God for life goes quickly and I want only the best for you.
Friday, May 8, 2026
You are now 17 weeks since having left us. Except for occasional bouts of listlessness and anxiety, I am faring well enough. I had a promising interview yesterday. I'm looking not at all my age according to a co-worker who said I don't look as old as I am. The down days are necessary, I think. I haven't grown as much spiritually, physically, nor mentally these past couple years, but I wouldn't know that without those down time reflections. I know I have to ultimately act after periods of reflection, but it's harder to know I have to act without having you and dad reliably there to help me prepare for the years to come.
We celebrated your birthday with a half cherry pie and half lemon meringue last week. This Sunday is the first Mother's Day without you also. We'll celebrate Yume and Jessie with conveyor-belt sushi today. New rhythms mixed with old traditions. We love and miss you!
My mom died on January 7, 2026. She was 70 years old. It was both her time and not her time.
Friday, May 8, 2026
Tuesday, April 28, 2026
To my mom, April 28
Tuesday, April 28, 1981
Today is the first entry I make since your birth, Lance, and I'm sorry it has taken me this long…
Two days till my 26th birthday. And so, at age 26, I have a beautiful, bubbly, month-old child. I have nearly forgotten the pain of that day—when you came into the world. It was some experience. Nobody can really tell you what it's like until you go through it yourself. Of course, we didn't plan for the cesarean, your father and I had hoped to be able to watch you come into the world in the delivery room, but after 24 hrs. of labor I was ready for any way that they could get you out!!
Today is the first entry I make since your birth, Lance, and I'm sorry it has taken me this long…
Two days till my 26th birthday. And so, at age 26, I have a beautiful, bubbly, month-old child. I have nearly forgotten the pain of that day—when you came into the world. It was some experience. Nobody can really tell you what it's like until you go through it yourself. Of course, we didn't plan for the cesarean, your father and I had hoped to be able to watch you come into the world in the delivery room, but after 24 hrs. of labor I was ready for any way that they could get you out!!
Looking back—the hospital stay wasn't that long (6 days) but throughout my stay I felt some self-pity on account of the pain and all, but, guess what?—I am now looking forward to the next time, when I can give you a brother or sister. So, little Lance, I'm just glad you're home and now we are three.
(Edit added later) April 30, 1981—Spent 45 min. in neighbors' storm cellar. Tornado strikes!! Lance slept thru it all!!!!!
Tuesday, April 28, 2026
Today is the first entry I make since my last birthday. And the first year we'll go without celebrating yours. Doesn't seem so long, but when I compare our ages you were 36 when I was 10 and I'm now 45 as Ewan is 10. That's nine years of child-rearing you started before me. And in 25 more years I'll be the age you were when you passed. Many of the days since your passing have been pained, but there's a measure of peace and relief, too. Nobody can really tell you what it's like to grieve until you go through it yourself. Of course, we didn't plan for so much of this so soon, as I'm sure Dad would love for you and him to still be bickering and arguing and carrying-on in the house in Rio like you were a year ago rather than where things are now.
Looking back, I think I knew the years would add up to something like this. I think maybe since my return from Japan and that year you spent teaching in Pleasanton. But what great memories there were along the way. Our wedding at your house. The kids' births. Lots of ups to balance the downs. I try hard to be grateful and not roll into self-pity, whatever may come. So, Mom—despite all the times I'm sure we'll still mess things up—I just hope you find more occasions to smile down on us from heaven than not.
Tuesday, April 28, 2026
Today is the first entry I make since my last birthday. And the first year we'll go without celebrating yours. Doesn't seem so long, but when I compare our ages you were 36 when I was 10 and I'm now 45 as Ewan is 10. That's nine years of child-rearing you started before me. And in 25 more years I'll be the age you were when you passed. Many of the days since your passing have been pained, but there's a measure of peace and relief, too. Nobody can really tell you what it's like to grieve until you go through it yourself. Of course, we didn't plan for so much of this so soon, as I'm sure Dad would love for you and him to still be bickering and arguing and carrying-on in the house in Rio like you were a year ago rather than where things are now.
Looking back, I think I knew the years would add up to something like this. I think maybe since my return from Japan and that year you spent teaching in Pleasanton. But what great memories there were along the way. Our wedding at your house. The kids' births. Lots of ups to balance the downs. I try hard to be grateful and not roll into self-pity, whatever may come. So, Mom—despite all the times I'm sure we'll still mess things up—I just hope you find more occasions to smile down on us from heaven than not.
(Edit added later) Summer 1998ish—Remember that hotel stay in Washington D.C. when a car accident happened outside and we were on the first floor?! I do! I slept thru that, too. :p
My mom died on January 7, 2026. She was 70 years old. It was both her time and not her time.
My mom died on January 7, 2026. She was 70 years old. It was both her time and not her time.
Saturday, March 21, 2026
To my mom, March 21
Saturday, March 21, 1981
On this day in 1981, Lance James Wright was born. God has seen fit to bring another healthy happy boy into the world, and he has blessed us as the parents.
On this day in 1981, Lance James Wright was born. God has seen fit to bring another healthy happy boy into the world, and he has blessed us as the parents.
For this child I prayed and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked of him.
I Samuel 1:27
Saturday, March 21, 2026
You honored me with these words you wrote. I pray I do the same with these and more.
Saturday, March 21, 2026
You honored me with these words you wrote. I pray I do the same with these and more.
Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.
Exodus 20:12
My mom died on January 7, 2026. She was 70 years old. It was both her time and not her time.
My mom died on January 7, 2026. She was 70 years old. It was both her time and not her time.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)